Finally I have submitted the material for Module 1 of the TKGA Knitwear Designer Course. It was a hard decision. I was about ready for a while but each time I went through the documents, I found something that I didn’t like, so I had to rewrite and change things over and over. Finally I reached a point where I had to admit to myself that I am running in circles and I need fresh eyes to tell me if things need further improvement or correction… so I took a deep breath and sent all materials in. I didn’t have to wait long until my instructor, Donna Estin reviewed the documents and sent her suggestions back to me.
She is fantastic, by the way. I am quite an introvert person, I hardly ever ask for help and haven’t got any self-confidence, but she made me feel safe all through Module 1 – I hope it makes sense, I try and explain it further. Raising a child with ASD is not easy. Top that with all the madness happening around us nowadays with the pandemic, the war, the collapse of the economy and the constant fear of the future, and you get that designing (and knitting) is my only happy place, where I can return to anytime I need a few hours to get away from the world (and I am sure I am not the only one designer in this shoe…). But this also means that it is very fragile. Every negative comment or critic can hurt (even if they are justifiable). What I like the most about Donna (apart from her high level of knowledge and enthusiasm) is that she corrects me without hurting me. This is why I feel safe to be myself and make mistakes.
I am really glad I started to take this course, I have learnt so many things already, and most of it was about myself. I have a clear vision about where I want to head with GK, now I only have to figure out how I am going to achieve that. It will be a slow process for sure, but I am starting now.
The hardest part was time management and dealing with procrastinating. The research for the material was very interesting but also very time consuming, especially compared to the progress that I visibly made with the material. Sometimes I felt I am working on my research night and day but I am not making any progress, so from time to time I set everything course-related aside to be able to concentrate on other things as well. But obviously this meant that I haven’t made any progress at all during these pauses, and it was really hard to convince myself to return to work on the research later. And the longer I was ignoring my research, the harder it was to pick up the thread again, so I quickly found myself in a vicious circle.
When I got the final letter about passing Module 1, I was relieved and excited at the same time. It is a sign to me that sometimes I have to take the courage and break my own limits. I enrolled immediately in Module 2 before this energy boost goes away and I sink back into self doubt… 🙂
In the meantime, I was working on quite a number of WIPs, too, which I am planning to show you in my next post. Until then: